WOWZERZ!!! It’s a massive 20years Wedding Anniversary for Gospel Diva Isabella and Husband!! Hurray!!!

About Isabella

A psychologist by profession, Isabella is a multi-award winning Gospel Recording artiste, worship leader, author, songwriter, speaker, radio host and founding president of Women of African Origin in Music Ministry. Isabella is also a pastor and certified marriage counsellor. Apart from her family commitments, the mother of four devotes most of her time running Isabella Melodies, her music ministry. She is also an exercise instructor and make-up artist.

I caught up with the love birds to share their remarkable marriage journey of love with the world.

  

Funmi: How did you meet and how did your relationship start? 

We both went to University of Nigeria. We had mutual friends. We used to attend the same parties and we hung around the same crowd. We initially met in 1987 but our friendship started during the summer of 1988 when he stayed back in Uni to complete some of his course work. We just naturally started talking a bit more and started getting closer but more as good friends than lovers.

I left after a few weeks to spend the rest of my summer vacation in Lagos but we were speaking often. We were both in other relationships at the time so we maintained our friendship without getting romantically involved. On getting back to school after the summer holidays, we were both pleasantly surprised at the depth of feelings we had developed for each other and how excited we were to see each other. We just could not deny the mutually strong attraction we felt towards each other so, after fighting it for a while, we both decided to end our relationships with others and stick together.

We faced a lot of flak for taking that decision. Most of our friends were not in support of our relationship and did not hide how they felt about it, so we faced quite stiff opposition at the start of our relationship. We were both teenagers but, as young as we were, our relationship was relatively solid because we were friends first and we were open with each other from the onset.

Funmi Shittu: How long did you date before getting married and how did you both know that the other was the one for you?

We dated for seven years before getting married. We were not born again at the time but we both got born again in 1996, a year after we got married.

Ogo: Because we were friends before dating, I saw a lot of great qualities in Isabella that I would like in my wife. I just instinctively knew that I would marry her and I told her at the time but she didn't believe me (smiles). She was very caring, loyal, respectful, kind and generous. She was also extremely intelligent, industrious and street smart, and those were important qualities to me. We had a strong physical attraction to each other but my decision to marry her was not based on physical attraction.

Isabella: To be very honest with you, my initial attraction to Ogo was physical (laughs). He ticked all my boxes: tall, dark, handsome and well-mannered. At that time, I wasn't thinking marriage as we were too young for it anyway. We were just having fun as far as I was concerned. Even when he said to me that he was going to marry me and put a ring on it, I laughed it off because he was a bit of a playboy (sorry for telling on you darling!). He had all the female attention which he was really enjoying at the time, so I wasn't 100% sure of where our relationship would lead but I knew from day one that I would say yes if he asked me!

Funmi: You mentioned that your friends were not in support of your relationship at the beginning, how about when you decided to get married, were there any challenges from your family?

Ogo: Well, my dad thought I was too young to be getting married but when I told him but he didn't try to stop me. I also had the same reaction from some of my uncles and aunts but there was no major opposition.

Isabella: None whatsoever from my side, my mum loved Ogo like her own son when she was alive but she died before we got to the point of marriage. My sister loves him to bits so she was excited about it.

Funmi: You have four children, did having children affect your relationship in any way?

Ogo: O yes, very much so. My first rude shock was how my wife's attention shifted from me to the baby when our first daughter arrived. Alongside loving my new born child, it took me a while to adjust to sharing my wife's attention with another person. We talked about it and tried to understand each other's perspective which helped us work out a balance. I sort of knew what to expect with the others. We have four children, our first daughter is 19 and our last son is almost 12 years old.

Isabella: Well, for me, I expected Ogo to understand that the baby needed my help more than he did. Also, a woman's body needs recovery time after pregnancy and childbirth so I guess he felt a bit neglected after the baby came along. I have to say Ogo is naturally a very patient person so he was quite patient with my unpredictable mood swings etc. We talked a lot and consciously made the effort to maintain the romantic side of our relationship by getting a child-minder to help with the baby.

Funmi: For a couple who have been married for such a long time, you still seem very much in love, what do you do to keep the spark in your marriage?

Ogo: We spend a lot of quality time together. We talk a lot, we play a lot and we always try to do things to make each other happy. For example, I know what makes my wife happy and I try to surprise her with those things every now and then. We go on dates and travel without the kids sometimes. I support my wife’s dreams and aspirations because I know that a happy wife creates a happy marriage and a healthy environment at home. We are spontaneous, not too structured and predictable.

             

Isabella: We laugh a whole lot! My husband has a unique sense of humour but his jokes actually cracks me up! We are very expressive, we hold hands a lot, hug a lot and really enjoy each other's company. We are our best friends and we are totally free with each other. Our kids always come up to our room to ask us why we are always laughing out loud when we are together. We are happy because we made a choice to be happy, not because everything is perfect. When a man loves a woman so selflessly, it is so easy to submit to him and when a woman submits to a man completely, she is easy to love and this really is a love cycle for us.