So You want to get Married! Why? (Continuation )

Thank you to everyone that read my previous blog on "So you want to get married". Thanks to all that shared their views on the blog and to those who personally sent me messages.

Now! Why do you want to get married? What is the buzz and why do we still bother getting married? Is marriage really necessary for everyone? Some questions needs answering before going into a marriage and how do you know for sure that person is “The One”. Can I just say this is such an enormous topic and so cannot be embrace in one goal.

Following on from my previous post, you cannot make good choices without proper biblical convictions, nevertheless bear in mind that that non-Christians have unknowingly made accurate biblical principles and gone ahead to have a successful marriage. What am I trying to say here? Not only Christians make right choices when it comes to choosing a life-partner.

Also in my opinion, I believe you can’t afford to carelessly leave your dating and relationship standards to chance (i.e. dating someone and hoping if it works out it works out). Both parties minds and thoughts process must be going towards one direction. Personally each party should ask each other where this relationship is leading to! People can call it “being forward” but it’s better to be forward than to be heartbroken and end up wasting your time (That is not being forward that is clear vision). Boys or girls will run away from that question but men and women of maturity will answer!

However, remember people can be deceptive in the process but that is where discernment plays a huge part. This personally worked for me! A lot of people have got their hearts broken by leaving their relationship and dating to chance. Your heart and time is too precious to you and God remember that (Proverb 4:23). “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”

I believe if you want to get married they are so many things one should consider. A lot of women and men wants a partner who is financially sound and can carter for their needs. While nothing is wrong with that, I believe that shouldn't be the only foundation for your decisions.

Can I just say this; I have come across some ladies that want a spiritually inclined personality like T D Jakes in the torso and a swag of Idris Elba or guys who are are searching for a lady with a body of Kim Kardashian or Nicky Minaj and the heart of Mother Theresa. Wait a minute, where are you going to obtain that? Don’t get this wrong, while I see the need of attraction and spark in a relationship and marriage but please “do not confuse attraction or appreciation with revelation in the choice of a spouse” (Rev. Olagunju)

Also, many successful marriages today started out without a solid financial background. Although nothing is wrong marrying a rich man or woman but that should not be the ultimate goal for your decision. So much is at risk if that's why you want to venture that marriage. I also think people should think about what they are bringing on board too when hoping to get married to a rich person. Why not think of it that way!

Remember marriage is not a gamble, don't embark on it and think if it doesn't work out that's it am out! On that note, let me ask you, are your standards based on Hollywood terms of romance and love or have you allowed God's holy word to shape your perspective. Fair enough if you don’t believe marriage should be based on Gods principles but in my opinion I believe marriage is an institution founded by God himself because He initiated the first marriage. Now think about that for a second!

On the issue about love, you must know for those of you who are not married and are reading this, in reality married life is not constant kisses and hugs, daily roses, total bliss and breakfast in bed. As much as people make it seem so! Don't get me wrong, marriage is every bit of it and as much with hard work.

Can I quickly say this even an ordained marriage that was done in Gods way and timing, still requires work and faces challenges. So with that in mind you can't afford to do it with the wrong person! Therefore on knowing that whoever you want to marry is not perfect, learning to live as one is not without its own challenges.

Finally, I got to go now please send me your views, comments and send your emails to funmi.shittu@yahoo.com if you don’t feel comfortable sharing your views on my blog. Every opinion and views are taken board. I love to know what your thoughts are and share this with your friends!!

Funmi Shittu